11 June, 2021
Loving the honesty of relationships
I LOVE the honesty of my relationships.
Over the years I have come to know – and
truly appreciate – people in my life who tell it
as it is, and for whom friendship, acquaintance
or association is based on a level of real and
During the past couple of months, I have
had the chance to reconnect with people and
rekindle relationships which I had let kinda go
by the wayside during recent years.
For many reasons I was quite happy to bury
myself in work, family and what I termed the
“busyness” of life with kids heavily invested in
extra-curricular chaos, and hide under a rock
– emerging only when I absolutely had to.
friends got it.
They knew the deal and, bless
them and their fabulousness, they understood.
The others, either thought I had just dropped off the radar, didn’t care or didn’t miss that I wasn’t around; and none of that really mattered.
It was what it was!
This week, though, I had a bit of a startling
reality thrown at me when someone I had
known for quite some time – but we had only
really had a business association and were only
on each others’ periphery – threw me well-intended,
but still (completely unintentionally)
“When I saw your message, I did wonder
what was happening, because you know,
I thought, well, Meredith only really gets in
touch with me if she wants something!”
Blimey that hurt!
And struck a chord!
Because, to an extent, it’s true – although with any take, I believe firmly in an offering of ‘give’.
Reassuringly, they said it wasn’t an insult or
slight – and I known this person and love their
honesty such that I believe them – but it still
made me think.
Another old school friend and I, who have
only recently reacquainted, met for a coffee
and catch up and following on, they text me to
be sure that everything we spoke about stayed
Given their position, and given
they were talking to a newspaper editor, it was
a sensible inquiry for them to make.
The third in this cadence of relationship
revelation, came over a lunch meeting with a
mate and former colleague.
We talked about a lot of things but we talked
most about the value of relationships – as in
It was crystalising.
See, the real relationships are the ones
where you can call it as it is and ask the questions.
They are the ones which are nurtured, but
not in the way where you have to walk on eggshells
or make hard work of them.
Of course, there are some which will be
harder to make work than others – and some
for which you will fight for harder than others
- but if there is one thing I have learned over
the years, it’s that the best relationships are
those built on mutual understanding, respect
Those are the ones which endure the test of
time, adversity, good times and bad.
There is a lot to be said for that old truth,
that the best of friendships (and not in the BFF
sense) are those where you might not speak for
ages, but when you do it’s like it was only yesterday
you last connected.
Not everyone is your friend.
friend will be a friend for life.
Another beautiful old (as in longevity, not
age!) friend recited to me that adage,
for a reason, season and life”.
My goodness, that is true.
Whatever the reason or season, or whether
for life; or whether they’re an associate, an
acquaintance or a friend for good times and
bad – there remains one steadfast nucleus from
which the relationship stems.
Honesty. First. Last.
And at every juncture in between. I
f you have that, then you have everything.
And my goodness, that is fabulous!